Today I am reporting to you live from the beach. I think I should have been born with gills… I love water. I am the jump in it, flutter around, splash people kind. Sorry in advance if that kind of water lovin’ bothers you. Looking at the ocean and all its’ vastness make you stop. You can’t take your eyes off it, even when all your friends are ready to go, shouting at you. The ocean makes me know that God is big and I need to recall that daily.
So yes, the ocean makes me stop. Stopping is an art form. Meaning, to rest and make your mind shut off is something you have to work at. Or if you stop too much you become someone who floats through life. Isn’t it ironic… even resting takes effort and thought. I have caught myself wanting to be busy because when I am busy I don’t have to process thoughts/emotions and I don’t have to tell people no. So this week I have pulled out of my gut somewhere the want to really let myself go there. It has been so hard.
That might sound annoying to some of you… “poor thing has to go on vacation to Florida and she is having a hard time RELAXING… Booo.” Haven’t you ever just not wanted to rest? In your little self awareness bubble you know that if you let down, you may really LET DOWN. And those kind of let downs are not fun. Not resting can be a form of avoidance and can look a lot like fear.
So I am choosing to not be that 5 year old who has to be coaxed into taking a nap, even though she is much nicer after she has had one. Or the 29 year old who has to be given a reprimand to enjoy FLORIDA! God is so good. He is the wave machine, knows the number of grains of sand on the shore, and He knows the exact condition of my heart. Evidence of his goodness is all around me… and I am going to rest in that!
